《LAID BACK IN WASHINGTON ART BUCHWALD》

By Way of Introduction13

PART I17

Trees' by RonaldReagan19

God Doesn't Vote21

The Boys on the Bus22

The Answer Man24

"Political Tours Available"25

Why Are People Mumbling?27

The Thrill Is Gone29

The Fashion Capital30

Transition32

Jackie Is Coming!34

Half-Fare Phobia35

The Answering Service37

Double Indemnity38

Christina in Moscow40

No Divorce for Singles42

It's All in the Image43

A 25th Anniversary Gift45

The Junk Phone Call46

Confessions of a Klutz48

Cheers!!!!49

PART II53

Somoza or Else55

Ifs AIl in the Paint56

A Pea and ThreeWalnuts58

Cutting Taxes60

"Casey at the Bat"61

When Not to Call the Doctor63

A Man for All Seasons64

No Time for the Godfather66

The Big Talk in Washington68

Defectors Need Love, Too69

Consumers Beware71

The Liberated Woman72

To Have or Have Not74

Cheap Fares76

Anyone for Civil Defense?77

Hyping the Shows79

Garage Sale80

What Would You Do?82

Nobody Knew84

Putting Seattle on Hold85

"He Didn't Watch the Game"87

"You're a Winner!"88

The Soft Underbelly90

Goodbye to Mr. Big91

PART III95

Saving Paper97

Breathe Deeply, Please98

The Hydrogen BombLobby100

Gas on Credit101

The Medicine Flackers103

Remedial Nuclear Energy104

Put on Your Life Jackets106

New Look at Mental Health108

The Women Who Wait109

Ladies Always Tell111

Poor New Jersey113

Autographs114

SALT B.C.116

Teddy in the Mirror117

A New Hospital Idea119

The Mustard Crisis120

Brain Surgery122

Help! Police, Help!124

The War of the Chefs125

Good as Gold127

A New Weapons System128

The New Status130

The New Retailers131

Just Tourists133

Books Kill134

The Marines Have Landed136

PART IV139

Trouble for Loan Sharks141

Three Coins in theFountain142

Chomp, Chomp, Chomp144

The Human Body Shop145

The Decline of S – X147

A Great Investment148

The Most Valuable Doctor149

A Tight Fit151

Something's Happening152

Leisure Will Kill You154

How to Buy a Car155

The Pope as Statesman157

No Politics for Carter158

Third World Friends160

Good Old World War III161

A Chrysler or Else163

The Real Olympics164

"That's Show Biz"166

Truth in Jewelry167

Sunny California168

The New Army170

"What Do You Do?"171

Oil Prices Unlimited173

Behind Closed Doors174

Washington Novels176

PART V179

I Want My Momma181

The Complex BrainDrain183

Garage Sale Fantasy184

The Class of 1980186

The Hard Sell188

The Exit Poll189

An Objective Panel191

A Strangelove Computer193

Letters for Losers194

Alice's Restaurant197

Cash and Carry198

Muskie and the French200

Mr. Chairman201

Coffee, Tea, or Talk203

A New Awards Show205

Nostalgia in Detroit207

Justice Is Served208

Take My House210

You Can Now Sue Your Spouse211

Won Ton Ronnie213

The Invisible War Machine214

The Hijacker Special216

They Did a Great Job217

The Greatest Chinese Mistake219

Election Year Whoppers220

PART VI223

The Guru Speaks225

The Tourists AreComing226

No Reprieve228

My Bendix Problem229

The Trouble with the FBI231

Take My Wife232

I'll Drink to That234

Getting Through on the Phone236

How Could You, Playboy?237

The Redskins Blues238

"Knock, Knock"240

The Customer Is Always Right242

No Reading for Johnny243

The Walking Wounded245

The Home Appraiser247

Arrivederci, Arkansas248

No Close Shave for Arafat250

Kooks Make the News251

You Have to Talk Business253

Torture in Moderation254

A Shot in the Dark256

The Good Old Days257

Dear Diary259

Mail Call261

Where Have All the Consumers Gone?262

Everyone Is Helpful264

Now for a Test266

The Washington Media Mafia268

PART VII271

Four Years in theThink Tank273

The Crystal Ball274

Transition Time276

Remember El Salvador!277

Appropriations Is Hell279

Setback for Earth280

With a Chop, Chop Here282

J.R. and Deregulation283

TV in the Courts285

The New Hostages287

Percival the Playboy288

Creation Vs. Applebaum290

"Off We Go"291

It's Great to be Rich293

Anchors Away294

How Playboy Did It296

The New Class297

Hope for Detroit299

The Stranger Amongst Us300

Don't Ask302

They All Sniff Mace303

A Lawyer Has to Eat305

We Need Students307

Have You Got a Minute?308

Ban the Bullet310